C.S.A Fathers!

[ohblueberry]

Thought you might find the following amusing.. .

They are all replies that women have put on Child Support Agency forms in the
section for listing father's details; the source has been omitted and I have just
typed what I was shown from a friends e-mail.

These are genuine excerpts from the forms (names removed)

1. Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A was
fathered by (name removed). I am unsure as to the identity of
the father of child B, but I believe that he was conceived on the same
night.

2. I am unsure as to the identity of the father of my child as I was
being sick out of a window when taken unexpectantly from
behind. I can provide you with a list of the names of men that I think
were at the party if this helps.

3. I do not know the name of the father of my little girl. She was
conceived at a party (address and date given) where I had
unprotected sex with a man I met that night. I do remember that the
sex was so good that I fainted. If you do manage to track
down the father can you send me his phone number? Thanks.

4. I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives
a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels.
Perhaps you can contact BMW service stations in this area and see if he's
had it replaced.

5. I have never had sex with a man. I am awaiting a letter from the
Pope confirming that my son's conception was maculate and that he is
Christ risen again.

6. I cannot tell you the name of child A's dad as he informs me that
to do so would blow his cover and that would have cataclysmic implications
for the British economy. I am torn between doing right by you and right by
the country. Please advise.

7. I do not know who the father of my child was a all squaddies look
the same to me. I can confirm that he was a Royal Green Jacket.

8. (name given) is the father of child A. If you do catch up with him
can you ask him what he did with my 'AC/DC' CD's?

9. From the dates it seems that my daughter was conceived at
EuroDisney. Maybe it really is the Magic Kingdom!

10. So much about that night is a blur. The only thing that I
remember for sure is Delia Smith did a programme about eggs
earlier in the evening. If I'd have stayed in and watched more TV
rather than going to the party at (address given), mine might
have remained unfertilised.

11. I am unsure of the identity of the father of my baby, after all
when you eat a tin of beans you can't be sure which one made
you fart.

12. I am unsure how it all happened, all I remember is that he was
huge and he kept calling me ''a lucky, lucky bitch''.


[&:] []